CSR Adventures

So this lady calls work today and she's a total punk...and she's mad for some reason...but I answer the phone and she's like.."I need to talk to someone, I've been calling and I feel misrepresented and I feel like the people who installed my dish left a BIG mess..." I don't know if I was just really tired or if it was how she said it but it was so funny I had to put her on mute so that she couldn't hear me laughing because I totally got the giggles. Seriously I was laughing so hard...I guess just because she was another white trash sounding caller that didn't even know what she was saying...Seriously, "misrepresented" by whom? Dish? We don't represent you...It's like what the hell are you talking about? What she probably meant was that she felt like her salesman lied to her. Luckily I gave the call to my manager because she wanted to talk to someone "In-charge." Riiiight. I laughed for like ten more minutes after that too.

Texting Sucks

What's up with texting? I'm so sick of it. I long for the days when I actually talked to my friends on the phone.

Born Again...

I should probably explain the very last part of my previous post. We have this joke, sort of ever since high school because all my friends were born again christians, or presbyterian or something to that effect. And since then I've talked with numerous friends that are mormon about how they also had friends like that in high school. And to us Mormons who pray fervently with heads bowed, hands clasped and eyes closed with our very formal language the prayers of any other faith often seem informal and not serious at all, even humorous. So one time with some friends we started talking about this and then started imitating the prayers which are often uttered with open eyes, hands at sides and sound as if they are talking to their dad or some friend rather than a diety. And they often go something a little like this..." hey Lord, what's up we're just here, trying to be cool and play some music and just worship you Lord...so help us to do that okay? Awesome, cause we love ya Lord. Alright...in your name, Amen." And all this being in the most indifferent tone, especially the last part where the in your name Amen sounds more like a split second decision to purchase a soft drink rather than end a prayer with reverence. There are many things I don't understand in the Mormon religion and culture for that matter, but one I do appreciate is our respect and reverence for our Savior. And other religions prayers often seem way to informal for me. I remember going with my friends to some of their activities and being so uncomfortable when the head youth leader would be looking around as he was praying and I only figured this out after my friend tapped me because I was the only one in the room who had my arms folded and head bowed. It was so weird. He just kept looking around, and I didn't know where to look and then we made eye contact. It's like how do you keep your train of thought? And I don't mean this in a condescending way at all. I felt stupid because I had no idea what was going on, since obviously all religions are different. Anyways...So it was in that mock tone that I chose to end my last post, because hey...I'm just trying to be cool here okay? Okay. And remember WWJD.

There are rainbows on every horizon

So...lately it seems everyone is gay. I mean everyone. I have questions about a lot of people's sexuality here in Provo and it seems others are having the same experiences as me. So in light of this...I have a story to share. I just joined Gold's Gym. I have been a member of 24 for 5 years, so that was a hard thing for me to do, but there just isn't a 24 hour close to where I live now. So I happened to join when I went to the gym one night with this guy I just started dating. So after I sign up and stuff and they gave me a pretty good deal...the trainer (who I had a sneaking suspicion was gay) hands me his card. And then John (said guy I am dating who is a financial manager for a volkswagen dealership) hands the trainer his card and says "If you need anything, not that your gay and want a jetta or something." To which the trainer replies..."Well actually I am gay, and I do drive a jetta. Hee-hee." All I could say was, "oh, that's cute." Ridiculous. John felt so bad, but it was soooo funny. I laughed about it later during some free time I had. But the guy was just excited about it and actually wanted to trade in his jetta. So anyways...the moral of the story is...gay people are all around, even in the land Zion. So get used to it, cause they're just trying to be cool and have some fun okay? Okay. In your name, Amen.

I met a boy...and I like him.

Counting Down

So I'm at work..which so far is cake. I just wrote my last college paper and got paid to do it. The phone only rings like every half an hour if that, but then again I'm ony training and the Dish Summer Season hasn't started yet. So it will get busier. But anyhow...I'm moving to my brother's basement this saturday! Rock on! Not BYU approved rip off housing. As I am graduating next thursday I went and got my hair done yesterday. I told her I wanted it more blonde...somehow that translated to "give me hair like Gwen Stefani." I'm sure my mom will have a comment, but in truth I kind of like it. Also I've been trying to exercise to look better for pictures. But since I've been so busy I really haven't been able to. So my new motto is "If you can't lose it, tan it!" So my goal is to become a Christina Aguilera look a like by graduation. And I'm proud to say I'm half-way there. Amazing how being tan can melt away five pounds in minutes! It's obvious I live in the moment. But hey we're all gonna get cancer eventually anyways. I've come to terms with it. It's not a matter of if, but when and which one? My guess is I'll either get skin, ovarian or breast cancer. The only thing I can say is hopefully I'll lose some weight when I have to do chemo and it won't kill me. Well just one more final to tackle, then a picture slide show to create and I'm Audi 5000 from YBU? I mean BYU.

One Way to Graduation

I haven't written in a while because I have been experiencing what I like to call hell week squared. The last two weeks of my college career before finals. And I don't really have finals I have projects. And to make the last two weeks just super fun I got deathly ill and my computer died for good...and took my biochem paper and another large assignment with it. I believe the guy who I paid 65 bucks to, so that nothing could be recovered told me it sounded like a dying remote control car. So I took some time that I already didn't have, to re-write those papers. Luckily it is all almost over. I only have about 3 more things to do that aren't too bad. Present my final project, do a take home final and I have one other final to take. But at this point, I feel kind of like a runner that is finishing a marathon, but at the very end is forced to sprint for 2 miles because someone is chasing him, and then bonks 1 mile before the finish line. I am that runner...dragging myself along the pavement. Even miniscule tasks such as filling out a questionnaire seem like mountains to climb. I've gone comatose. That metaphor would work even better if I was a runner. But I don't even like running. And I've never ran a marathon. I don't even know if I've run a mile. Just kidding. I do need to give a shout out to my sister Pickle who has totally helped me get through by being awesome and sending me all my favorite shows on DVD. I am now caught up completely with LOST!!!! what what! She's the bomb. I love it cause she's not working right now...by choice, cause she's that cool, so she makes me all these cool DVDs and stuff apart from doing her other job which is clean out my old german granparents old crap. I would like to include an excerp from an email she sent me...I was rolling on the floor. Nicole says: "my current job is going through a musty box of half german, half
english papers that opa maintained over the last 20 years of his life.
old brokerage statements that i'm going to have to shred...which is
such a joy. i'm so looking forward to that musty moldy pile of
shreddings, so i can bury my face in them on the way to the garbage
and have an asthmatic attack. then i'll go and cleanse my nasal
passages by pouring salty water through them with my ayurvedic
cleansing pot...and blow the musty snot out into the sink to avoid
said asthmatic attack." The funny thing is that I can totally picture this whole scene playing out but little Nicole, dutifully doing it just like Dad would. Wow...let's hear it for Nicole! Can I get a raise the roof?

Walking and talking, not as easy as it sounds...

So last night I was talking to my mom on the phone. Just to preface this my mom kind of talks a lot and she always interrupts you while you're trying to tell her something. You'll be in the middle of a story and she'll ask some random question, and the whole time your thinking if you'd just let me finish you'd find out the answer to your question. So last night, I'm totally sick and I'm trying to finish a research paper that is due the next morning and I'm just trying to tell my mom about it but she keeps asking me these irrelevant questions about my internship and where I'm going to live this summer, blah blah and all the while I'm just trying to make it through the week. I don't have time to think about that yet. So I'm typing this paper while "listening" to her talk. But the most aggravating part is that I want to get off the phone because I'm about to collapse as it is, and she's walking the dog. So in between her talking there are intermittent bursts of really loud yelling "no tessa!, bad girl!...oh what a nice puppy." and then back to me, "sorry margs, anyways blah blah blah"...ten seconds later..."aaaahhhh, no no tessa!" then back to me..."she got off her leash gotta go sorry...*click!*" I'm like, random, but finally I can finish my paper. Then she calls back! We weren't even talking about anything anyways..so then I talk to her for another ten minutes essentially re-capping on everything that we said before. She's so weird. The whole conversation was interspersed with talking to the dog or other people out on walks too. So if I ever was trying to say something I'd be interrupted every ten seconds by that. Don't get me wrong I love me Mom, she's really sweet and considerate she's just not the best multi-tasker. The whole time I was just laughing because it was just so funny, yet I was so annoyed. Guess you had to be there.

In sickness and in health

I'm sick. I almost made it a whole semester with no illness. Too bad school doesn't stop for disease. The only thing that afforded me some pleasure today amidst being sick and sitting through 4 hours of class while stressing about the other million things I have to do was when...We were taking a survey and this really dumb annoying girl in my class raises her hand and asks, and I quote... "Um...Does Relief Society count as like, a sorority?" Immediately I thought...someone please punch her in the face. I guess I'm kinda cranky today. Oh well I forgive myself.

Textiles, Tests and Papers oh my!

I'm stressed...actually I have so much to do this week I don't even know where to start. College is so hard sometimes. And today in research methods we had to go around and look at the research posters in our building. And just as I said "This is gonna take forever and we don't even get a stinking break!" the teacher walked by. And this is the one who hates me. I'm retaking another one of her classes from last year too. (see the entry about the test key) I turned red, but we were in the most remote corner of the basement who knew she was gonna be patrolling the area! But really, who cares? I was already on her bad side after correcting her in class when she said something about the Morbidly Obese classification. I merely told her that it's called Obese III now because the "morbidly" made people feel bad. She just looked at me like I was retarded and continued her lecture. Hey, I think it's lame too but that doesn't change the fact that it's different now, get with the program Fullmer. And I guess she also hates me because I never go to her classes, and when I do I talk during them or draw pictures or crack jokes. Whatever. I'm graduating in 3 weeks and then I'll never have to see her feathered hair again. Meanwhile...I have much more important things to worry about, like ordering textile samples for my management class, then taking 3 tests, writing a biochem paper and ten page research proposal. Riiight. "Time goes by...so slowly...so slowly."

Delicious Dreams

So this weekend I went to wendover as usual. I finally fall asleep at around 11, after tossing and turning because the pillow is too soft, or almost being asleep but waking up and freaking out because the nappy motel sheet kept touching my mouth. So I'm asleep...and I start having a wonderful dream. Kiefer and I are making out, except I'm not myself I'm Amanda Bynes in this red dress (the same one she wore in She's the Man...I had recently seen it.) So just as we hit the bed and he's about to grab my butt I hear a blood curtling scream (in my dream)and then I wake up to my roomate's phone ringing. It's my other annoying roomate who's in Provo calling Patti about some class notes at 7 am!!! I mean couldn't it wait till say 8 when I had to wake up anyways? I was so bitter. Did you have to pick the day I have the makeout dream? Not only could I not continue this dream...though I tried, you know where you close your eyes and try to see if it will keep going, which it didn't...I couldn't even fall back asleep because I was just so aggravated. I'm just laying there fuming about it. I mean it was so real. You know those dreams where you know you're dreaming, but that makes it so much better because you just savor every moment. My inner monologue went something like this..."ya i'm kissing kiefer, and I look hot, and I'm kissing kiefer'...Ya that's what I got ripped out of. I'm not exaggerating...I wanted to cry a little. Anyways. I'm over it now. 24 is on tomorrow. I guess that will have to be enough.

Being grown up SUCKS...but 24 ROCKS.

I'm so bored right now. Once again I'm passing time until my next class, but I really want to go home. Even though I can't. I have to work on this work sheet and my day is go go go until like 11 tonight. I hate these days. It's these days that the ADD comes out and I just want to go home chuck it all and lay in bed for the rest of the day. But I don't. That's probably the one thing college is good for...making you do crap you don't want to. I guess that's part of what being a grown up is. Not throwing a tantrum every time you don't want to do something. What if people still did that? Like your boss gave you something to work on and you were like "OH gosh...no way, that sucks. Grrrr. Do I have to do that?" Actually I'm pretty sure I still groan out loud when a new assignment is handed out and I'm a senior in college. So apparently I'm not very good at being a grown up yet. I'll have to work on that. And what's funny is one of my friends always calls me the newborn because I used to take so many naps. I've tried to cut back. I'm probably at about toddler status. I try to keep it to one a day. Oh but anyways the reason I started writing this (gosh that was a huge detour) was that 24 rocked last night! When Audrey and Jack had that emotional moment. It was so touching. Once again I pretended the hand was mine.

1 out of 10

I just found out I had to take a quiz and I didn't study for it...but I took it online just now anyways. Ya I probably should have studied a little bit because I got 1 point out of 10. I am offically retarded. I should have known the stuff. Gosh I'm so stressed out. School is slowly squeezing the life out of me...like a lemon in a vice. Let's just hope I have some juice left to last me to the end. I mean I was mad about that quiz, but I'm pretty much over it now. That's the beauty of being a senior. You bomb and you move on.

Girls that have never met are not meant to live together

Okay...I have to say my roomates are interesting...one is just plain psycho. The other is really sweet and nice but just young and annoying. Sometimes I feel like my apartment complex is just an extension of the dorms where people are yelling and screaming and throwing stuff at each other all the while yelling "holla!". Anywyas the nice/slightly overly enthusiastic one is always asking me to do stuff with her and her little friends which is so nice of her, but I never want to go because basically I just can't picture myself hanging out with her friends. I mean what would we talk about? I just always picture them sitting around talking about the lame guys in the ward that they like and stuff like that. I feel like my sarcasm would be completely out of place. Yet she keeps asking me to do stuff, she never gets the message. And I wish she would because every time one of the roomates tries to talk to me or whatever my blood pressure rises a little. And I don't know if it's just me or what but everytime someone knocks on the door to my room, I get all tense and nervous like wondering how I'm going to pass what feels like an eternity until either one of my roomates is done talking about whatever and they leave me alone. Like the psycho one will just come in and ask me my opinion on random stuff that I don't give a crap about either way, just to talk to me. I even get tense when I use the bathroom sink or mirror and she's in there. However, that's probably because sometimes I'll come into the bathroom and she'll be on the pot with the door open and all the lights off and it will scare the living daylights out of me. Ya you heard me...believe me I've asked her to shut the door to which she replied "sorry sometimes I'm just too lazy." Too lazy to shut the door while your dropping a bomb? Well get un-lazy cause nobody wants to witness that, believe me besides the fact that I jump every time it happens. Only 5 more weeks...then I'm free.

STOP THE SODA, START THE SUPPLEMENTS!

So today in Biochem (I know what your thinking, and yes I went to class) we learned about Calcium and Phosphate balance. I have learned about this many times before and know the consequences of eating or drinking foods that are high in phosphorous however today it really hit home. I mean, I was sick after. "Let me splain"...So because Ca and Phos always have to be in equilibrium in the blood. If there are high amounts of Phosphorous...the Calcium in the bone is pulled out of the bone and put into the blood so that it can be as high as the phosphophorous in the blood. And when you drink Diet Coke like I do (I mean it sucks because of the Aspartame already which attributes to "aspartame sickness":headaches, anxiety, increased heart rate, even psychosis in some states!) which is really high in phosphorous you are basically screwed because any excess phosphorous you can't use is excreted in the urine, and guess what since Ca and Phos have to always be in balance the Ca is excreted too. And it's hard enough for us women to get enough Ca anyways, even without throwing the whole phosphorous thing in there. And I'm lactose intolerant so milk is not an option, and it is the only really bioavailable source of Ca. Ca is not absorbed well from plant sources because of phytate compounds that block it's absorption. So word to the wise and to myself: STOP DRINKING SODA!!! AND...TAKE CALCIUM SUPPLEMENTS EVERYDAY!!! Supplements are as bioavailable as drinking milk. Now is the time. After age 35 your bone mineral density decreases by 1% a year no matter what you do!!! Okay...so it is definitely my resolution to stop drinking soda. ASAP. I might even form a support group. Like Diet Coke Anonymous. For all the coke whores out there. (obviously I'm not talking about the powdery substance you suck up your nose through a small straw.) I can't help those people...I don't even know if I can help myself. Debbie Downer...wha whaaah.

Why foul faced?

Oh ya...someone asked my why the blog is called foul faced and what that means...So I'll explain. Basically it's just a fun saying. But mainly it's just a saying I use in various settings. I'll give you the definition Balderdash style: foul face(fowel-fa-ce): When something is gross, appaling, unappealing or ugly. As in that monkey's butt with the dingleberry hanging off is foul faced. Or if someone fell out of the ugly tree and pretty much hit every branch on the way down, then that person is foul face or a foul face. Ya pretty much however you want to use it, it's pretty open. And I named the blog that, no...not because I am ugly..but I tend to not hold back on gross details or just inappropriate subject matter. And I tend to think fairly vulgar or crude things are hilarious. I mean my three favorite movies are Zoolander, Anchorman and Wedding Crashers. Anyways...So that's the name of my blog. Deal with it.

Weekends...

It was a long weekend...to sum up:

The highlights were:
1.My Aloha mango chicken salad at Rumb-I.
2.Frank Vitchert's gonna murder your a**!
3.The fact that when the weekend ends it's Monday and 24 is on.


The lowlights were:
1. Driving back and forth from Wendover
2. Buying this sweat suit at Wal-mart that I thought I liked well enough for working out, so I rip off the tags but then I decide I hate it. Now I'm stuck with it. This is why I don't buy cheap crap from Wal-mart. But I was trying to convinve myself I could be thrifty and that it was cool. But my roots always come back out and I realize that me trying to be cheap just results in more money lost in the long run because I loathe cheap clothes. But it's not like I do it on purpose, it's more of subconscious thing, I can't control it. I wish I could do it, believe me it would save me a lot of money and grief from my mother.
3. Not getting my .avi files of Lost to work on my ghetto computer. Gosh.

But it's monday in provo. The search for my eternal companion continues...lol. I don't think he's here.

Test Key

So today I just went and asked my teacher for the key to the test. She just gave it to me. No lecture. I guess it was all in my head. Pretty anti-climactic. I tried to quit diet coke today. It didn't work. Like it hasn't worked for the past 35 times I've tried to quit. It's like the second the headache comes on I cave. I have no pain tolerance. I'm in a rut. I need to make a change....can you hear Micheal singing it. Don't worry Miii-cheal.

Adventures in "nutrition"

So last night on my way to Wendover (for my job) I had had a diet coke. And we're driving and we hit Tooele, which is still about an hour outside Wendover, and I had to pee, but I was talking on the phone so I didn't get off. So the next stop isn't till almost to Wendover. I ended up stopping at the Bonneville Speedway because I had to pee so bad I couldn't hold it till we got to the hotel. I'm serious this was bad. I was sweating and even moving in the seat made me want to cry. I hobbled to the bathroom and pee'd for 4 and a half minutes. Out of control. I tried to quit the Diet Coke earlier that day but to no avail. I'm still trying though. That night I started to watch Donnie Darko and as soon as I heard that creepy voice "I've been watching you.." I had to turn it off. I was too scared. I'm going to try again tomorrow. So we go to Wendover to do community programs and stuff. But today was a hard day for me because we were teaching kindergartner's about eating dairy. Being lactose intolerant and the fact that I think it is horrible for you (atleast from the cows we get the milk from--who are drugged up on anti-biotics and growth hormone) it was hard for me to sing the song about happy cows planning to give their milk to make cheese, ice cream, yogurt and pudding. Riiiight. In reality these cows are not on a grassy knoll, but face to butt in dark cold stalls with pumps attached to their nipples. I desperately wanted to be the Neo in their lives giving them the red pill to rip them out of their rosy world and reveal the dark and cold reality of the dairy industry, but after all...they are only in kindergarten and that probably wouldn't have gone over very well with the government grant we're being paid by...oh well...another day another dollar...even us health and nutritionists gotta eat right? My brother would disagree.

If you want to see more pictures of me...
Go to
http://marganjoyful.blogspot.com Ya baby...grrrr! hahaha