Men, Women, DirecTV and Stress Relief

So the latest happenings in my life are pretty dull. I am steadily growing larger in the stomach region and the booty region and everywhere in between...and just been trying to study for my dietetics boards. Really the most amusing part of my life has been John lately. Well, if you look at it that way, which I definitely do. So John has been working a lot of late, as usual, but this weekend in particular, since they had a big sale. He's basically really burnt out of work and needs a vacation. I just want to preface this tasty little snack of humor by telling you that I can only remember one other time that John has gotten as mad as I'm about to describe, and when these situations happen it's all I can do to stifle the laughter at the absurdity and hilarity of his antics. He's rarely mad at me, usually work or some other situation so it makes it easy for me to get a good seat and watch without fault or blame. So that one other time, he couldn't find his keys and he was really late for work. So he was essentially moving through the house like a tornado, looking in places that his keys would never be like under my pile of clothes on the chair. But neverless each item of clothing was effortlessly tossed in the air and across the room as a child would throw up leaves from a freshly raked pile. He then madlly searched our bedroom and the rest of the house. It got to the point where he was just throwing things out of place just from sheer frustration. And it's mean of me but it was all I could do not to laugh. When he finally left I moved through the house after him restoring order similar to the way the women of the house in Mary Poppins did after the colonel down the street fired his canon off the roof. But I digress...the point of this particular entry is to talk about the DirecTV "mishap." So John came home after a particularly stressful day and sat down on the bed to relax and watch TV, when the DirecTV remote started malfunctioning. I don't think it was really working at all. And this wasn't the first time we had had problems with our tv, satelite, phone and internet, all through direcTV. So, I'm calmly sitting on the bed when all of a sudden John throws the remote on the floor as hard as he can screaming "Gosh dang it!!!!" Or something to that effect. I am totally shocked and basically frozen with amazement and wonder, when he throws it down again as hard as he can and before I know it bits of plastic are flying everywhere and the whole remote has split apart into atleast 6 pieces...the inside, the rubber buttons, the two outer shells and some other broken plastic shards. So as I am picking up plastic, I calmly inquire why he has just destroyed the remote, because up until this point I had not even realized that it wasn't working. To this question he replies (in an almost surpisingly calm voice after what just happened)..."Well DirecTV doesn't cover the remote control, you have to pay for it, so if it's going to be broken it might as well be BROKEN." "I see, okaaay." RIIIIIGHT. So he calls DirecTV to cancel or whatever or get something done about the crap service. I kind of tuned out for most of the phone call, but tuned back in when I hear..."About the remote...you don't need that back if you give us a new one right, because I sort of dropped it on the floor to see if that might make it work better." To this I burst out laughing and I think I said to the dogs..."Actually he smashed the crap out of it because he's a rage-a-holic isn't he Maya." To which we both start laughing and I get the "Shhhhh!" So I guess the moral is....sometimes you just need to smash the crap out of something to relieve stress. I think it might be more of a male need, because I would much prefer to sleep or read to relax. But the remote smashing is something that reminds me of the Cromagnon men that we learned about in Junior high that we were supposed to have evolved from who tried to make fire and jumped around and got angry like monkeys would. I don't believe in evolution in that way, but when our men act like this I can see how other people can find the similarities. I'm sure us women do some pretty interesting things as well that no man will ever understand, just like we don't always understand them. But I guess until I do, I'm content to sit back and enjoy the show. Because it's always a good time.